So, I decided a few months ago that I would go back to school. I was all gung-ho and ready to take it all on. I thought..."If they can do it, so can I ..right..of course right." So I toppled head first into classes. I am taking 4, English Comp 2, Sociology, Algebra for idiots, and Anatomy and Physiology 1. Oh man, have I ever bit off more than I can chew. The first three aren't really hard..they are just time consuming.
But A&P..geeze louise...I'd like to think Im a fairly bright person. I've had a background in Emergency Medicine. I keep telling myself I've met some pretty stupid nurses in my time. And if they can do it...yeah so.......
I've hit my first Are-you-sure-you-are not-kidding-yourself moments. Im currently in the 2nd chapter..and freaking the heck out. Chemistry is like greek to me. I keep looking around in class wondering if I am the only one that thinks he should speak English. Seriously? This class is HARD. I think I might be screwed. So.....Yeah.....Whatever........
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
I remember when.....
Why does life have to be so fricken hard? I remember when life was easy, Though I think I was like 13. Today has been such a crappy day. A day following the crappy one yesterday. I can't even do this today. So much on my mind and Im writing constipated.....Ugh!
Monday, March 03, 2008
Saturday, November 11, 2006
Lonliness....
Lonliness....
I'm lonely...surrounded by those who mean well and love me completely.
Im alone inside my skin...fending off depression. I've never been a depressed person,
never been one to view life though a glass half empty. It bothers me that I can't pinpoint my source of depression. I'm unsure of what is fueling my desire to drive my car into the bay.
Sadly.....im alone right now.
I cannot afford the luxury of a full blown meltdown. My recent spiral left those I love trying not to commit me to the looney bin. Why do I always have to be the strong one...why can't I be the one who needs someone else to pick me up off the floor?
I dont know......I just dont know....I dont know much anyway.
Sigh.
I'm lonely...surrounded by those who mean well and love me completely.
Im alone inside my skin...fending off depression. I've never been a depressed person,
never been one to view life though a glass half empty. It bothers me that I can't pinpoint my source of depression. I'm unsure of what is fueling my desire to drive my car into the bay.
Sadly.....im alone right now.
I cannot afford the luxury of a full blown meltdown. My recent spiral left those I love trying not to commit me to the looney bin. Why do I always have to be the strong one...why can't I be the one who needs someone else to pick me up off the floor?
I dont know......I just dont know....I dont know much anyway.
Sigh.
Wednesday, July 05, 2006
Grindage....
Grind......Grind...grind...grind.....
I worked today. Crappy day. It went wrong from the start. I was a in a good mood till I got there. Customers out the door..needing their fix. Hurry hurry. "Lemme have a double tall, decaf, sugar free vanilla, soy, lite whip, latte.......and be quick about it."
No prep, no time, very little patience. It is only coffee, right? Make the mocha, the frap, the whip, and wash the never-ending pile of dishes. Mop up the leaking toilet water. Hang the "Out of Order" sign.Wait on hold for 15 minutes.Terrible elevator music.
Not enough time and no more patience.
Do the deposit and give the breaks. Take out the trash and make the drinks. Only coffee, remember.
So little time for the personal contact. For the "how's the kids" and "whatcha up to today's". When did it become more than coffee?
Tomorrow, another day, hopefully better. Attitude adjustment needed.
Sigh.
I worked today. Crappy day. It went wrong from the start. I was a in a good mood till I got there. Customers out the door..needing their fix. Hurry hurry. "Lemme have a double tall, decaf, sugar free vanilla, soy, lite whip, latte.......and be quick about it."
No prep, no time, very little patience. It is only coffee, right? Make the mocha, the frap, the whip, and wash the never-ending pile of dishes. Mop up the leaking toilet water. Hang the "Out of Order" sign.Wait on hold for 15 minutes.Terrible elevator music.
Not enough time and no more patience.
Do the deposit and give the breaks. Take out the trash and make the drinks. Only coffee, remember.
So little time for the personal contact. For the "how's the kids" and "whatcha up to today's". When did it become more than coffee?
Tomorrow, another day, hopefully better. Attitude adjustment needed.
Sigh.
Friday, May 19, 2006
Bee Nice!
This is a note a few of us "night shifters" wrote to a "day shifter"in response to a note he left for us. (confused yet?) Some names have been changed to protect the innocent! For those of you who work at Starbucks..you will understand. Here's a big SHOUT OUT to Akeelah and the Bee, may she rest in peace.
Joe~
Next time you write us another appoggiatura,
think about this. There is no need for lyceum.
We on the night shift are full of pulchritude......
you know what I'm talking about.
Kira is brunneous,
Amber is reminding of a great pastiche,
and Miriam, well don't get me started
on her prestidigitation.
One word: Argillaceous.
We are all as ambidextrous as a pterodactyl.
Don't hate...Appreciate.
Where is the Love, Joe?
We have a good Euonym for you......Meanie!
Be nice, Byyyyyeeeee
( thanks to the author of this note...you rock.)
Joe~
Next time you write us another appoggiatura,
think about this. There is no need for lyceum.
We on the night shift are full of pulchritude......
you know what I'm talking about.
Kira is brunneous,
Amber is reminding of a great pastiche,
and Miriam, well don't get me started
on her prestidigitation.
One word: Argillaceous.
We are all as ambidextrous as a pterodactyl.
Don't hate...Appreciate.
Where is the Love, Joe?
We have a good Euonym for you......Meanie!
Be nice, Byyyyyeeeee
( thanks to the author of this note...you rock.)
Monday, May 08, 2006
Ode to the "O" ring.....
So, Some of you might know, and for those of you who don't, an "O" ring is a very needful item in the great scheme of whipped cream making. My new friend from work, hey darlin', found out the hard (hilarious) way, the truth behind the mysterious "O" ring.
My poor darlin', came to me the other night and said, " I can't seem to get the whip-it to discharge correctly." Me, with all my prior bullshit knowledge, was sure it was operator error. Oh how wrong I was!
I said to her "Hold on to the bottle while I turn it upside down so you can feel the CO2 go though the container when I discharge it. So she bravely held on, blind faith in my problem solving capabilities. I discharged the CO2 and waited for the feeling of the bottle being charged with air. Only it didn't work quite like that.
Instead of filling the bottle, it filled the air and covered my trusting comrade with whipped cream. I screamed and then dissolved into hysterical giggles, all the while pointing the spouting bottle at my dear friend, still trustingly clutching tightly to it. There was whipped cream all over her, the floor, the walls, and more on her. I bravely traipsed to the bathroom to wipe the 2 drops off of my apron while she stood there, in shock, looking very much like a frappuchino topper. LOL!
Ok so, the moral to the story is this, always check the inside of the WC container to insure the "O" ring is in it before you add the CO2. Sorry honey.....:) Love ya
My poor darlin', came to me the other night and said, " I can't seem to get the whip-it to discharge correctly." Me, with all my prior bullshit knowledge, was sure it was operator error. Oh how wrong I was!
I said to her "Hold on to the bottle while I turn it upside down so you can feel the CO2 go though the container when I discharge it. So she bravely held on, blind faith in my problem solving capabilities. I discharged the CO2 and waited for the feeling of the bottle being charged with air. Only it didn't work quite like that.
Instead of filling the bottle, it filled the air and covered my trusting comrade with whipped cream. I screamed and then dissolved into hysterical giggles, all the while pointing the spouting bottle at my dear friend, still trustingly clutching tightly to it. There was whipped cream all over her, the floor, the walls, and more on her. I bravely traipsed to the bathroom to wipe the 2 drops off of my apron while she stood there, in shock, looking very much like a frappuchino topper. LOL!
Ok so, the moral to the story is this, always check the inside of the WC container to insure the "O" ring is in it before you add the CO2. Sorry honey.....:) Love ya
Thursday, May 04, 2006
She remembers
So, I wrote this during my latest foray into Creative Writing.
Enjoy....
She remembers…..
He sleeps…unaware, blissful
His mother guarding, ever watchful.
The even cadence of his breath,
Touching the core of her being.
She remembers……
The perception of freedom before this child,
Peaceful, quiet oblivion.
Colorless searching for her life’s fulfillment.
Always wanting, needing something else.
She remembers……
The day, the knowledge, coming change
Suddenly protective, cautious….aware
Nauseous and terrified by turns.
She remembers…….
The rhythmic beating inside,
Keeping time with some unheard piper.
Beating its tunes on the top of her bladder.
She remembers…….
Time……to go, to push, to scream, to cry.
Sweet agony, the foreshadowing of ecstasy
Alone in her pain…then stillness
The cry.
Tears of joy, release and redemption
She remembers…….
Sleepless nights engulfed in hazes of exhaustion.
Forgotten, in a moment of peaceful embrace.
A look, a bond, total contentment.
She remembers…….
He sleeps…..
Innocent dreams behind lidded blue eyes.
The slumber of one loved and protected.
Unaware that she watches…..softly smiling.
And remembers……..
Enjoy....
She remembers…..
He sleeps…unaware, blissful
His mother guarding, ever watchful.
The even cadence of his breath,
Touching the core of her being.
She remembers……
The perception of freedom before this child,
Peaceful, quiet oblivion.
Colorless searching for her life’s fulfillment.
Always wanting, needing something else.
She remembers……
The day, the knowledge, coming change
Suddenly protective, cautious….aware
Nauseous and terrified by turns.
She remembers…….
The rhythmic beating inside,
Keeping time with some unheard piper.
Beating its tunes on the top of her bladder.
She remembers…….
Time……to go, to push, to scream, to cry.
Sweet agony, the foreshadowing of ecstasy
Alone in her pain…then stillness
The cry.
Tears of joy, release and redemption
She remembers…….
Sleepless nights engulfed in hazes of exhaustion.
Forgotten, in a moment of peaceful embrace.
A look, a bond, total contentment.
She remembers…….
He sleeps…..
Innocent dreams behind lidded blue eyes.
The slumber of one loved and protected.
Unaware that she watches…..softly smiling.
And remembers……..
Wednesday, April 26, 2006
A new friend.....
I made a new friend yesterday. Saw her again today.
I like her so much.
We are alike, her and I, but vastly different as well.
She is a kindred spirit. Forgive the "Anne of Green Gables" -ness of it all.
I am grateful for a new friend, in whatever capacity that may be.
I tread very carefully into the "newness" of these waters.
But I am grateful for the knowledge that I do have something to offer.
That I am worthy of being a friend. Lessons learned.
I have turned the corner. New adventures are ahead.
I welcome them.
I like her so much.
We are alike, her and I, but vastly different as well.
She is a kindred spirit. Forgive the "Anne of Green Gables" -ness of it all.
I am grateful for a new friend, in whatever capacity that may be.
I tread very carefully into the "newness" of these waters.
But I am grateful for the knowledge that I do have something to offer.
That I am worthy of being a friend. Lessons learned.
I have turned the corner. New adventures are ahead.
I welcome them.
Sunday, April 23, 2006
My wish for you......
For those of you, you know who you are, who have been there for me through thick and thin. I have realized of late that you really know who loves you when you go through the worst.
I have this new CD by Rascal Flatts.....I love this song.
I dedicate it to you....
My Wish......
I hope the days come easy
And the moments pass slow
And each road leads you
Where you want to go
And if you're faced with the choice
And you have to choose
I hope you choose the ones
That mean the most to you
And if one door open to
another door closed
I hope you keep on walkin'
Till you find the window
If it's cold outside, show the
World the warmth of your smile.
But more than anything
More than anything.
My wish for you
Is that life becomes all that
You want it to
Your dreams stay big
Your worries stay small
You never need to carry
More than you can hold
And while you're out there gettin'
Where you're gettin to
I hope you know somebody loves you
And wants the same things too
Yeah, this is my wish
I hope you never look back
but you never forget
All the ones who love you
and the places you left
I hope you always forgive
And you never regret
And you help somebody
every chance you get
Oh, You find God's grace
In every mistake
And always give more than you take
But more than anything
Yeah more than anything.
This is my wish...
I hope you know somebody loves you
May all your dreams stay big.
I have this new CD by Rascal Flatts.....I love this song.
I dedicate it to you....
My Wish......
I hope the days come easy
And the moments pass slow
And each road leads you
Where you want to go
And if you're faced with the choice
And you have to choose
I hope you choose the ones
That mean the most to you
And if one door open to
another door closed
I hope you keep on walkin'
Till you find the window
If it's cold outside, show the
World the warmth of your smile.
But more than anything
More than anything.
My wish for you
Is that life becomes all that
You want it to
Your dreams stay big
Your worries stay small
You never need to carry
More than you can hold
And while you're out there gettin'
Where you're gettin to
I hope you know somebody loves you
And wants the same things too
Yeah, this is my wish
I hope you never look back
but you never forget
All the ones who love you
and the places you left
I hope you always forgive
And you never regret
And you help somebody
every chance you get
Oh, You find God's grace
In every mistake
And always give more than you take
But more than anything
Yeah more than anything.
This is my wish...
I hope you know somebody loves you
May all your dreams stay big.
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